Friday, October 17, 2008
Blog Post #6: Biodata
After obtaining my Diploma in Chemical Process Technology, I went on to pursue a Bachelor degree in Chemistry at NUS currently. Being a responsible, self-motivated and organized individual, I was appointed as a leader in my final year project during my polytechnic education with my project mates. With a fun-loving and easy-going attitude, I enjoy traveling and meeting new faces. My ambition is to set up my own fashion business. I believe that positive attitude and perseverance are the keys to survival and success in my life. “When the going gets tough, the tough gets going”
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3 comments:
Hi Seow Teng,
The contents of the biodata is adequate and is of a suitable tone.
However, some parts of your biodata will require a change in sentence structure. For example, "After obtaining my Diploma in Chemical Process Technology, I went on to pursue a Bachelor degree in Chemistry at NUS currently." can be replaced by " I am currently pursuing my Bachelor of Science after obtaining a Diploma in Chemical Process Technology."
Cheers!
nic
Hi Xiao Ting!
I was quite surprised to know you were into fashion! Well I understand how fulfilling it is to run your own business and see results from it so go for it!! ^_^
As for the biodata, I feel that you've used an appropriate tone so no problems there. You've also managed to mention your own traits and link them to your academic stuff and interests. However I see that you are missing other achievements/participations in perhaps a club/society or even secondary school. But I guess it's difficult to squeeze them into a 100 word limit. Maybe you can make your sentences more concise?
Just my own opinions. :) All in all, good job!
Hi Seow Teng,
I agree with Nicholas that the first few sentences need to be rephrased. He has actually done a good job of rephrasing the first sentence for you.
Yes, attitude is everything. To me, it determines how you approach a situation and how successful or not you will be in life. You can make the best out of a terrible situation or you can decide that you can't do anything about it.
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